Monday, August 9, 2010

Levi Johnston, the future of reality TV

I LOVE Levi Johnston! No, don’t X me out let me explain. You know Levi right? He's the guy who had a child with Palin's daughter BEFORE MARRIAGE *Gasps all around us.* And if you still don’t know then he's that guy who has no personality and is somehow famous.




This guy couldn't BUY a personality. Even Kathy Griffin failed to work him over. And now he's being offered a reality TV show. Reality TV, how could you sink so low? You were already below sea level when you first broke the scene, but now?! You might as well put CSPAN on your primetime spot. He won’t draw anyone I don’t know anyone that says BOY I LOVE THAT LEVI.



Let me explain why Levi is the best though. He has a child with Palin’s daughter who is currently appealing to the ultra right wing Tea Party members. These guys are the #1 bible thumpers across the board hands down. And their own leader has a daughter who had a child before marriage.



And you know what? They don’t CARE. They’re fine with it. They don’t mind at all about the fact she couldn't take care of her daughter and tell her not to have children before marriage like all good Christians should do. He even cheats, from what I heard? Adultry 110%. And you guys have kept your mouths closed.



So yeah let Palin run this country, she can't even care for her daughter on her OWN STANDARDS that she set for American's. She's always preaching about God and doing the Christian thing. Just like her supporters, but she can’t even get her KIDS to follow what she says. What a dive.



Back to Levi, though, I'm sure he's not going to do some stupid stunt to get you all to watch his show.



Breaking News: He’s running for Mayor of Wasilla, Alaska.



Well, I was wrong, but can we honestly say we will care? We already hate our own state elections let alone an election FOR MAYOR of the most unappreciated office job ever. (WAY TO GO FOR THE BRONZE RING LEVI!) In a place I'm pretty confident no one could locate or spell for that matter.



You know what I want to see? Levi should run for president.



I'd watch his show then if he ran against Palin in 2012 for the GOP ticket or w/e party he runs in. The future in-laws going at it for the presidency as the entire world watches these two incompetent imbeciles fight for a spot in front of the red button that says "DONT PUSH MISSLES, WILL FIRE". (A little picture of a missile is on there because back in the Bush days we needed visual aids.) I'm sidetracking though.



Think about it, the unmarried couple, the child who could say witty one liners five times a show, the crazzzyyy grandma. The cheating Levi and maybe Kathy Griffin could be the ex who lives next door. Give her something I don’t know. It will have all of us watching in fear. It's perfect. It's Days of our lives without the bad acting. GO FOR IT TV.

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